Knowing how to respond to social gatherings when you’re sober can be a year-round challenge, but during festive seasons, there can be even more pressure than normal. But carefully planning how to deal with extra parties, crowds of people and the general stress of holidays means you can enjoy them safely and have some good, clean fun as well.
Keep Connected to Recovery
The holidays are often busy, whether it’s Christmas shopping or prepping for a fourth of July party. But don’t let your recovery routine get pushed aside. Whether you attend fellowship meetings, meditate, write a daily gratitude list, or see a therapist, make time to do these things no matter how busy you are. If something helps you to stay sober and happy, it’s imperative not to let that habit slip. If meetings are cancelled or your counselor is out of town, arrange to meet sober friends or call other people in recovery who make you feel safe and supported.
Be Nice to Your Body
It’s important to take care of your basic health needs, making sure your body is strong and your mind is resilient in the face of extra stress. Get enough sleep — or if you do have a few late nights, take regular naps or rest breaks. Eat well and have regular meals to keep your blood sugar stable, which will help to improve your mood. Make time for regular exercise, even if it’s just a walk around the block every now and then or a trip to the local park. Moving your body will produce chemicals which help you deal with stress.
Don’t leave things to the last minute. Plan your food or gift shopping in advance so you miss most the crowds. Online shopping is also a great way to avoid the rush in the stores or having to wait in line. Spend quiet time away from the hustle and bustle.
Use Mental Reminders
People who are facing holidays sober sometimes worry that they might be missing out. Even if you see others drinking and having a good time, remember that you have a different relationship with alcohol, but you can still choose different types of amusement without the use of intoxicants. What are you missing out on anyway? Wasted money, spilled drinks, embarrassing and possibly dangerous incidents, and waking up feeling like you’ve been run over by a steam roller? Remind yourself about how far you’ve come by recalling strong mental pictures of what you were really like when drinking so you won’t feel tempted to fall off the wagon.
Coping with Stressful People
The stress of the festivities can lead to friction between family and friends. Set very clear boundaries with anyone who you anticipate might be a problem. If you do this in advance, then dealing with people should be easier. If a certain family member provokes you, have plenty of pleasant topics you can direct the conversation toward, such as good times you’ve had together or hobbies that interest them.
Offering to help people who seem irritable could reduce their stress levels, meaning they should be less likely to snap. It never hurts to lend a hand in the kitchen, which can give you a bit of breathing space and also help take the strain off others. Overall, be kind to the people who stress you out the most – it may be exactly what they need. Let them blow off steam and just listen without taking anything personally. It’s likely that they’re stressed out too and don’t know how to deal with it.
Sober Holiday Partying
If you’re going to a party at someone else’s house, bring a bottle or two of something tasty and non-alcoholic. If you have your own drink, you’ll be less likely to be asked if you want an alcoholic beverage. Toasting with a non-alcoholic drink means you won’t feel left out or wonder what to do in the moment.
You could even decide to organize a festive party of your own. As the host, you can choose a selective guest list and ensure there are plenty of non-alcoholic options and food. You can kindly ask people not to bring alcohol since you will be supplying all the refreshments.
Enough Is Enough
At certain times during the holidays, you may feel like it’s all too much. Watching people become drunk, obnoxious or argumentative can be very distressing and is not good for your serenity or mental health. For your own sanity, know when to call it a day. If you need to leave a party early, thank the host and slip away quietly. If you feel that you can’t leave a special event, take little breaks away from any chaos. Refresh yourself by getting some fresh air, listening to some calming music, or meditating for a few minutes every now and then.
If you really can’t stand all the festivities without jeopardizing your recovery, why not spend time doing something different, such as volunteering at a homeless shelter or soup kitchen for a few hours?
If any of your coping mechanisms upset other people, remember that your recovery is the most important thing, and you must put it first. Always keep in mind what the holidays should really be about – goodwill, generosity and peace.
Written by Beth Burgess
The post How to Prepare for the Party Season When You’re Sober appeared first on Michael's House Treatment Centers.
